That particular word is staring at me: taunting me, mocking me.
However they try to phrase it, nothing changes

I read it over and over again hoping that something will change. Am I reading it wrong? Did they misspell something? Maybe if I refresh the page the words will change. The first stage is denial.

I read it over and over again, angry at myself. Why did you write that? ‘You should have written this instead’, I tell myself. The second stage is anger.

Thereafter, bargaining and depression hit like a wave.

Finally, I come to terms with it. It wasn’t meant to be. My mother told me that if something is meant to be, it’ll happen; nothing should be forced.

I’m excited to see what the future will hold. I’m excited to see where I’ll go. I’m excited to see who I’ll become. And maybe I’ll try again in four years; who knows?